Who?

2006-12-15T13:42:00.000+08:00

This is the ending and I've moved on!

Will I see you there?

2006-12-14T01:11:00.000+08:00

Room For Dessert is LOVEEE!

If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!

2006-12-12T23:30:00.000+08:00

I don't know how I spend my money or where they have flown to but anyhow, IM BROKE OLADY :D :D

Well I think I paid for the fun that I've been having.

Had an awesome time (though only went for half of) at the zone camp on Sunday at Sentosa/YMCA. Then made my first official visit to Vivocity with Derrick and watched my first movie there on Monday - Open Season! Thank Golden Village, Singtel, Mrs Tan and her son for Movie Money :) lol and a time dreaming about six islands. Met up with the peeps and my Bestfriend today at Escape. Thank Downtown East for turning 6 and charging only 6buckeroos. Hehs and what's best is that we caught up! You'll always be my friend, you know too much

2006-12-11T01:20:00.000+08:00

An eccentric person who is damn irritating but surprisingly, is very capable of spreading joy to others. His name is like a hynonym to mine.

AND HAHAHA DYLON, I DID YOU A FAVOUR AND POSTED IT! :D :D

2006-12-10T01:39:00.000+08:00

Memories past. Now they are like good movies, a distant, comfortable place to which I escape. A moment's fantasy simply triggered by a familiar name, a familiar smile and a familiar laughter we used to share.

2006-12-09T12:32:00.000+08:00

Ouch, yeah ouch ):

It is eating me from inside.

I had a whole long entry to post and when I was about to complete it with a damn fullstop, a thought hit me and I erased it.

If only its as simple as highlighting and backspacing in order to delete these thoughts. If only I can say "Forget it, that's not important" (just like Dylon) and mean it. But its not as easy as it sounds.

2006-12-09T01:19:00.000+08:00

And all the roads that lead you there were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
And afterall
You're my wonderwall

**

The fall has yet to be broken

2006-12-07T12:05:00.000+08:00

Yesterday can be considered one of the best days I've had ever since I got back. Gave tuition in the morning and it was so fun (lol, I think I missed him too much) because we're starting on composition writing (: Went to the National Library - ohman damn embarrassing because I think it has been open for more than a year already (I still remember vividly Ryna and Rhubini telling us how cool and nice the place is before Olvls) so anyway, it was embarrassing because it was my first time there. Hah! Wanted to borrow "For One More Day - Mitch Albom" but it was on loan ): So I settled for a memoir by this lady who grew up during the Khmer Rouge. I've always been the kind who would imagine the story being acted out before me as I read books and when I read "When Broken Glass Floats", it was as if I really saw how the Cambodians got tortured at the Killing Fields and how life was in the villages. The disparity between being and knowing is definitely great.

Met Shijie and Teo (yes, two of my favourite people on Earth!) for late lunch/early dinner. Mr Chng wanted so much to have buffet and at 4pm, no where else serves buffet except for Sakae so we found ourselves there stuffing sushi into our mouths after a long walk and talk around Suntec. LOL!

Teo: Eh, I like that one
Chng: You like ah, okay take take
(blink of an eye, you see 5 plates of the same one on the table)

Then we walked around and started playing with remote control planes and UFOs. Damn fun! Haha, both of them looked so keen on bagging one home and Teo did. He bought the UFO! It's really cool - can fly up to 4 storey high. The plane is even cooler because it flies up to 10 storey and can navigate but it's a good 40buckeroos -_________-!!

Chng went to work and Teo walked with me to YMCA and we had quite a good talk. We are always full of regrets. Attended bible study with Alex. I slow-walked home from Compass. Felt so good to walk alone along busy roads and past quiet streets. This is a countdown to living on my own.

You're starting to have a rough idea. It's tough. I'm sorry. Chance seems to be stopping me from confronting it and I hate to leave it this way. Teo was right, me and my sucky reasons. I'm always trying to convince myself with them, thinking they are so justified but I don't realise how even more self-centred and self-righteous I'm for trying to not be self-centred and self-righteous.

To the 2 people who always make me laugh and smile, thanks for a wonderful yesterday :D

2006-12-05T13:43:00.000+08:00

4 signs (from Tangy Goh Pei Shan)

4 people that make me smile/laugh :
1) Sally Sumiko Seet Siew Ling, Siew Mai
2) Shijie
3) Derricks (oops, I cheated)
4) Sunny

4 things that make me smile :
1) Honeystars
2) Toddlers
3) Old people
4) Icecream in nutty flavours

4 ways to win my heart :
1) Scare me with rats to make me cry
2) Make me laugh at the expense of oneself
3) Talk to me and intrigue me
4) Open me up

4 people i believe and trust in :
1) Mai Siew, Ling Siew Seet Sumiko Sally
2) Evon Goh Mei-Yim
3) Goh Mei-Yim Evon
4) Lingaroos

4 things i hope to do now :
1) Make Christmas cards
2) Go Genting and sit all the rides
3) Watch DVDs till the teevee explodes
4) Go through Eternal Sunshine and stop thinking

4 things i do everyday :
1) Think
2) Drink apple juice
3) Bum around
4) SLEEEEP

4 people i want to see now :
1) My Bestfriend named Evon
2) Chng Shijie
3) Cindy Teng Lili
4) This certain friend that I've lost

4 people who should do this :
The 4 people who can make me smile/laugh :D

4 things i'm doing now:
1) Music
2) MIA-ing
3) Hibernating
4) Enjoying a good Sabbath

2006-12-05T13:29:00.000+08:00

Hello, photos from Miss Joanne Lee (now aka Mrs Joanne Leong)'s wedding at CHIJMES on 03 December 2006

When God made you, He must have been thinking about me

2006-12-02T12:54:00.000+08:00

We went with a mission to teach but we returned being taught. Everyday was lessons on human nature, loss, turmoil, nature, beauty, simplicity and love.

I'm back

The team has caused me to realise that situations can be reverted. The Cambodians has shown me selflessness. The teachers has shown me what trusting wholeheartedly means. I have returned believing that it is worth it to take risks. And these lessons can not be taught with other methods but only with actions. By proving each and every of my doubts wrong, they have ignited the flame on my candle and caused me to believe in hoping once again.

I've changed

I'm a different person already

Last night when I touched down, two of my favourite people came to welcome me and after having a meal together we cabbed home. She told me about what has changed the most in the span of 13days that I haven't been around. She said that she has agreed. If I had not went to Cambodia, my reaction would have been "I can't believe it" but 11 hours ago, on the backseat of a Translink cab, the first thought I had was to imagine how elated the both of them were at that moment. Him who waited quite awhile to finally pop the question and she who let love override expectations. I was happy to know that here's yet another two people who can show me that to stop wondering, action has to be taken. And that was why my first sentence to her upon hearing that was "I'm sure he was very happy right" :)

Anyway, it's a nice feeling to have someone to hold and to love freely and here's my best wishes to both of you! You have my full support and unlike others, I have no doubt at all about how happy you would always make my friend feel and how you would always stand by her in good and bad times. I am confident that you will prove yourself. May the love be with you, lol

Not as skeptical as I used to be anymore

2006-11-25T11:40:00.000+08:00

Hello, here's Delia reporting from Cambodia :)

It's Day 6 and our team has gelled up very well already. We have gotten to understand each other and come to enjoy each others' company after all we've gone through as a team and facilitation regarding individuals' life journeys. I've learnt alot and there is more for me to learn in the coming 7 days :D

Siewling, seems like we missed the chance to talk online ): Takecare aight, I hope everything's well for you. Hugs. and VIP glad you're enjoying my favourite company as much as I usually do, lol :D

ANYWAY I CANT WAIT TO SEE YOU ALL AT THE AIRPORT ON FRIDAY OKAY! Even though I'm enjoying myself here and would very much like to stay on because life is so simple here but I know where I should belong, lol

The sky is filled with stars

2006-11-18T23:01:00.000+08:00

Hoorah!!

In 7hours time we'ld be on the budget plane towards the land of Cambodia for our expedition project :D :D I believe You have gone before me.

Lings, I'm very sorry I can't be by your side during this period of time. Face the challenges before you bravely okay, I know you will conquer them all. The battle has already be won so just step into the field and claim your victory :) The Lord will uphold you and you will be at another level when I come back. I love you! and yes, I will miss you too (hugs)

Very Important Person, thank you for everything you have done for me. Be it just being there for me whenever I needed you, lending me a helping hand, supporting me in all I do, cheering me up, basically just being all I can ask of a friend and I love you for that too. When I'm back, we'll have a whole week of fulfilling-agenda-fun yeah :)

Teo, I really want you to know that I truly care for you. Thank you for always wishing me well and all, I know that's your way of showing your care. I miss you already..

Shijie! I will miss you and your nonsense. Talk to you more again, haha :D

Juls, take care of yourself and I'll be back to hang out with you. Just you and I okay!

Charis! Enjoy your trip to Cambodia too!! HEHEHE! Thanks for being a wonderful classmate girl :D

It's just two weeks, two weeks, two weeks!

I've come to realise how much you mean to me

2006-11-17T23:04:00.000+08:00

I don't need to give any reasons
You're a reason in itself

2006-11-17T00:51:00.000+08:00

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

My spirit is willing but the flesh is weak ):

2006-11-14T00:05:00.000+08:00

If you leave me now, you'll take away the biggest part of me

I'm a person of few words. I often fail to allow others to see what I honestly feel. I even tend to let others have the wrong impression of what I try to convey. I hate to express myself. It is not because I don't want to, it's because I don't have the ability to. Maybe that's why I can't see eye to eye to people who are extremely headforth and direct, and why I find myself in awkward situations with these people. Sorry Daryl and sorry, Saheli.

It weighed on my heart and the whole time I felt apprehensive. I dared not talk about it, as if the slightest mention would cause the Earth to shake. I dared not think about it, as if one thought would cause my being to shrivel up. When we finally talked about it, I knew you were uneasy. I felt guilty for making you tell me. In that moment, I just wanted to throw a hug over you just to tell you that "everything is going to be fine". But I just sat there, looked into my bowl of noodles and squirmed in my seat.

The twenty of us sat in the classroom and awaited our turn to receive our verdicts. I felt at a lost when I saw people I hold dearly panicking, anxious and crying. The only thing I did was sit by my seat. What others didn't know was that my heart was interrogating myself for not offering a shoulder, for not giving my friends a pat on their backs, for not flashing a smile to a palpitating heart and for not embracing them. The only thing I did was sit by my seat, and wipe my teary eyes.

I stepped into a chilly councillors' room, with a couple of our schools' student leaders seated around a table having lunch. They were commenting on the large percentage of retainees in their council and mentioning familiar names. I did not know what to say or what to do. I just sat by the table, stared into the hamsters' cage and wishfully hoped that the hamsters could have understood how I've been feeling throughout the whole day once I stroked it. All it lacks is a touch, to teach it how to feel, how to react and how to understand. Maybe all it has to do is just sit there and listen. Just listen. Maybe. I've never felt so helpless before ):

You have left and taken away the biggest part of me

2006-11-06T00:29:00.000+08:00

Unlike other girls who spend their best times with their girlfriends at shopping malls and cinemas, doing their nails and choosing their skirts, we often find ourselves sitting under the same sky on the ground, drinking from a can and living in our own world. Pouring ourselves out and letting each other in. I can never thank you enough.

It was different this time round - my third time pledging but I never felt this way before. Above the little that I have pledged, my whole being went along with it. Like I threw myself into the blue bucket that was passed down the aisle, I pledge myself and promised to give beyond what I have vowed to give. By the end of the six months, I would be someone more than who I am today. And along with who I am today, I will give.

Not because of who I am but who You are

Who will I be six months from now, I don't know. But one thing I know for sure is that even though doubt co-exists with faith, there is Someone, whose thoughts are higher than Einstein's, even if he reaches the optimum probability of using every neuron in his brain, who exists in me.

I am looking forward to knowing you better

2006-11-05T02:11:00.000+08:00

S8------4-
Who are you?

And it's all too familiar,
And it happens all the time.
All the cards begin to stack up,
Twisting heartache into fine,
Little pieces that avoid an awful crime,
But it's you I can't deny

All the atoms in me are feeling happy :)

2006-11-01T23:35:00.000+08:00

Despite the week being slow, draggy and monotonous, causing me to feel extremely lifeless, I've been taking time to think about every minute detail of my life.

Past, present and, future

Let me think as far as you do
I don't want to leave you alone

I realised how densed I've been. Hoping for something, getting it and then wishing I never hoped for it. Looking for something, find it and hoping to lose it. Losing something, think through it and start looking for it. Possessing something, used it and lost it.

2006-10-30T15:32:00.000+08:00

24th October 2006

Us at Bels' place :)

27th October 2006

The clan at Settlers' celebrating Charis' birthday!

29th October 2006

Tenses Games at NUS

2006-10-30T14:59:00.000+08:00

Are you afraid of losing someone you hold onto dearly?

We lose people not to others but to time. In fact, it is time that should be sentenced to the deadliest punishment ever. It's a natural instinct to look for someone/something to push the blame to when something goes wrong. When we lose touch of someone, we find ourselves blaming the lack of time, the lack of sincerity, the lack of commitment and the lack of concern for the friendship to do so because we have become so caught up with our own lives and are too busy.

Is it true? That it is because of all the above that causes friends to transform into people they did not once know? Is it true? That is it because of the entrance of new friends, we should lose the old ones, even if they once meant more than life?

We have all grown, left a chapter and entered a new one. Made new friends and slowly along the way, realised that we have neglected the ones we used to call upon daily, the ones who used to finish up our sentences, the ones who used to say the same words as us at the same time.

Who wants to watch a person they love drift away from them? But I have come to realised that one day we will have to say goodbye. Regardless of how much I do not want that to happen, it will. I haven't went through more than 2 decades but have already lost quite a good many of people that I used to love dearly and still do. Even though we may not be part of each others' lives anymore, they are still part of my memory, a part of my heart and nothing will change that. People can step in for only a moment but that can last a lifetime. I know that with the entrance of them since the first day I knew them, I was richer than I was before. And even though time has been picking and taking one by one away, I know that I have not completely lost them.

Maybe you were right. That life being unpredictable makes it what it is.

2006-10-29T01:01:00.001+08:00

What did you say?
I know what you were singing
But my ears won't stop ringing
Long enough to hear those sweet words
And your simple melody
I just have to hear those sweet words
Spoken like a melody
I just wanna hear those sweet words

Who am I?

2006-10-26T16:36:00.000+08:00

We question because of questions that have already been answered

2006-10-26T01:21:00.000+08:00

The most embarrassing thing happened to me today. I decided to take bus service number 85 to school because I know that the bus will definitely have seats to offer and the longer bus ride (compared to 965) will allow me to nap longer. It was so comfortable to the extent I didn't realise that the bus has reached where I am supposed to alight and I slept on. My poddy was blasting into my ears so I didn't even hear anything from my surroundings. So I slept on. Then a really sweet schoolmate tapped on my shoulder furiously to wake me up, (embarrassing moment). I was so so so sleepy, I grabbed my stuff and stood up. Attempted to slip past this man next to me but I dropped my bag on the floor (wle, yet another embarrassing moment). Didn't really help that everyone on the bus was staring at this girl who seemed like she could sleep on and never get up. Picked it up and scampered down the bus rubbing my eyes and thanked the girl.

Weird. I was planning to start going "School is such a drag" blah blah but whatever I said during that 1 minute sharing I gave during GP lesson today came back to me. I was supposed to share on the topic of School impromptu. Did some crapping as usual and I went like "I'm sure we will find school a drag these upcoming weeks but let's think positively and think about what school has offered us in our lives. Friends and other memorable experiences persay.." Haha! Rubbish yet true. Yet, who can resist not to fume at the thought of going back to school 5 days a week until 17November 2006?!! It's a never-ending vicious cycle - promos just ended and now we're having intensive mother tongue lessons together with daily project work meetups. Not forgetting that in the midst of all these, we're also having proper lessons (yes, new topics!). So even after 09Nov (my OP date), I'ld have to lug my sleep bones to school for lessons to learn about the Hydrological Cycle more indepth, calculate the Probability of everything, love Raju even more and understand new theories on Economics in the language of Shakespeare.

Lol, nevermind! What's another 3 more weeks in school when I have already endured 27 *? :D :D I love chinese! I love chinese! I have yet to do my chinese worksheets! I love chinese!

*excluding holidays somemore!

2006-10-25T00:20:00.000+08:00

Can I stay away forever, and not come near again? I dare not face what has drawn near to me and dare not shun it away. Yes, I am gutless and I know that. Despite of all the broken legs and squashed up backsides, I'm still a sick cat.

Went to Annabel's place today after such a long time. I haven't met up with her, Evon, Vivian, Jing, Tingster and Rachy, as a group, in half a year already and it was quite a good bonding session :) Met the cellgroup for dinner at Bedok and whiled the night away at the Youth Park, watching bikers do their stunts and talking about who would make the cut to be our whole. Occured to me that I have gradually and unknowingly gave up on all the criterias and lovely dreams. Yet to find out the reason but I'm sure that for now, I have lost all trust and hopes in having someone to hold. Once again, no reasons.

Take a look around me
What you see is what you are and what you are is beautiful

2006-10-24T00:30:00.000+08:00

Headed down to Juls' place after school today for a Movie Marathon of Stay Alive and Click. I sort of felt asleep during Click? Lol! Then I woke up and saw dear little Charis next to me wiping her tears and telling me "man, this show is so sad!". So after that first run ended, I went back to the part where I fell asleep from and watched it.

The scene came where Newman found out that his father had died but he had missed that moment in his life. Not because he missed it on purpose but because he lost the power to live his own life. He went back to the last time he saw his Dad, old and wrinkled, yet cheerfully entered his glamorous office and asked him out for a drink in the evening together with Big Ben, his son. Newman turned down the offer with his head kept down towards files that meant millions of dollars to him. When his father tried persuading him to take time off, he shunned his father. "I'm sorry I barged into your office, Michael. I love you, Son" then he walked away, heart in hands.

(rewinds)

I love you, Son (rewinds)
I love you, Son (rewinds)
I love you, Son (rewinds)
I love you, Son (rewinds) ...
(staring back blankly)
I love you too..Dad
(staring back blankly)

**

Don't lose your life to your life

2006-10-23T01:16:00.000+08:00

Silly Sally Revelation #1738174:
IT MEANS NOTHING TO YOU BECAUSE YOU DID NOTHING FOR IT

When a scatterbrain of a chatterbox spends a whole afternoon + evening at your place, you can't help but be happy that you're not alone (pun intended) :D :D Thankyou. Thankyou for coming and making someone who just recovered to cook for you, to entertain you, to let you read things never read, see things never seen and do things never done before. Thankyou for being that person who enables her to be courageous. Thankyou for accepting her and her ways as she accepts you for your ways (ahh) Let's continue unrevelling life's mysteries and I'll make an effort to do something to make it mean something to me. Maybe I was too tired doing everything and got nothing during that time, that now I just want to sit down and be something.

I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon

2006-10-21T01:13:00.000+08:00

"This is the part with the twists and turns, where lives hang in the balance, and you see something shocking you've never seen before" -The Prestige

And I saw you walk out of that video, smiled at me but turned away and continued to walk your way

"Feels like we're living in a dream"

2006-10-19T18:01:00.000+08:00

I sat for my favourite subject today. I've not been down with throat infection and flu for two days. I found the paper to be really easy. I'm sure I will score for it. I'm sure.. (sounds like Shijie when he's being sarcastic, hurh) I thought I was out of breath. The paper sucked. My nose sucked. Something happening behind everything is sucking. But if the world didn't suck, we'ld all fall apart.

When the day seemed like it cannot be worse, when you feel like nothing's going to ever make you feel better and that you can't even find the strength to talk about what shit happened, thank God for toilet paper in the world, thank God for a friend you can confide in two rolls of toilet paper. Thanks, I love you. You're probably the only who can make me cry over the phone, sulk and complain, listen to all my selfish rubbish and then wipe everything away, allowing me to feel comfortable after that :D Will you be my wife forever and ever and ever? <3 But I know I'ld be murdered by a certain Eastern man if you agree, so ):

16hours till this whole trauma will be over, I think

**
You're waiting for someone to put you together
You're waiting for someone to push you away
There's always another wound to discover
There's always something more you wish he'ld say

He's everything you want, he's everything you need
He's everything inside of you that you wish you could be
He says all the right things at exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you and you don't know why

**

2006-10-14T23:23:00.000+08:00

With every appearance by you, blinding my eyes,
I can hardly remember the last time I felt like I do
You're an angel disguised

POST EXAM ACTIVITIES

19Oct - ~~Lunch with Teo~~
20Oct - ~~The Prestige with Teo and Zone Meeting~~
21Oct - ~~Family Dinner~~
22Oct - ~~Give tuition and Slackeroo~~
23Oct - ~~Movie Marathon at Juls' with Tumbletots~~
24Oct - ~~Cellgrp outing :)~~
25Oct - Town with Juls
26Oct - Give tuition
27OCt - Celebrate CHARIS' BDAY!! and Cellgroup
28Oct - Service and hang out with SClique
29Oct - Give tuition
30Oct -
31Oct - Amos' Bday

CWB, STRAWCLUB, EVERYONEEE! :D

2006-10-14T14:53:00.000+08:00

Hello! Yesterday was cool and nice, felt like the examinations were already over. Cut school and headed down to the airport with the Tumbletots (Charis, Cheng, Juls, Gary). We studied really hard (yeah..) at the airport's Coffee Bean and counted down to 3pm. When the time came, we marched our way to Sakae Sushi and had the time of our lives. We managed to exceed our target of 80 plates by gobbling down 84 plates in total. LOL :D :D Wild time there I must say.

I went down for cellgroup and after that Lings, Shijie, Fel and I decided to ton. Spent a couple of hours as RPlaza Macs and then we came back to my place for UpWords and to slack the night away. Shijie and I cooked for the rest, lol YES SHIJIE HELPED IN THE KITCHEN! They left at 6plus and I slept till now.

Evidently, I "should get over and done with my examinations as soon as possible" (says Shijie) because I'm already in the holiday mooooooooooood! WHOOHOO! lol, 6 more days! xD

2006-10-10T18:17:00.000+08:00

A song that we used to sing back in primary school has been ringing at the back of my mind for the whole of today. Then I remembered a picture that I used as my blog template last year. It never fails to show me how much everyone in this world, regardless of age, longs for a fatherly figure to run up to like a child. They often turn to everything and everyone else but to no avail.

**

Did you ever talk to God above?
Tell Him that you need a friend, to love
Pray in Jesus' name believing,
that God answers prayers
Have you told Him all your cares and woes?
Every tiny little fear, He knows
You can know He'll always hear
and He will answer prayer

You can whisper in a crowd, to Him
You can cry when you're alone, to Him
You don't have to pray out loud, to Him
He knows your thoughts
On a lofty mountain peak, He's there
In a meadow by a stream, He's there
Anywhere on Earth you go
He's been there from the start
Find the answer in His word, it's true
You'll be strong because He walks with you
By His faithfulness, He'll change you too
God answers prayer

**

It may seem like talk can be so cheap at times because words can often touch hearts but not situations. That's why I honestly don't have much to say these days regarding the upcoming examinations. Even I am extremely concerned for my Math and all the subjects because these subjects can be so unpredictable, especially Literature and Economics. It seems like anything from the universe can appear on the question paper and they can phrase the questions in a myriad of different ways and Geography requires you to memorise a whole lot of information weighing 10GB. I don't say much because I really don't know what to say. People can be uplifted by words of encouragements for this moment but in the next, they will be face to face with the mountain before time once again. So right now all I want to tell you guys is to take a chance and just say it in your heart "I know You're here listening to me, I am scared and worried about what might become of me end of this year. Can You please help me through this?" and trust in Him whom I believe in. It really hasn't been based on my own effort and for being "a mugger" but it is truly in an awesome God that I follow everyday.

People do question believing in the unseen but really, what's truly real and unreal in this world? Is what you see with your own eyes really really really real real?

I believe therefore I have spoken

2006-10-08T22:37:00.000+08:00

Silly Sally Revelation #1738173:
THERE IS POWER IN READING ARCHIVES

Yeah, I went through her blog and unrevelled many things. From her confession to someone she now loves about her love, to an imitation of Shijie making fun of her, I also found this:

**
"Now, in everything I do, I think of my mum first"
That was what you told me and I remember feeling so overwhelmed by that statement of yours. Because that was probably the moment I saw for myself why everything is so different now: Our personal pleasure has taken a backseat for once. Its like the driver of our car has changed and the destination changes along with it. The journey gets a million times tougher. And hell, we don't even know where exactly we're heading. But now, we're working for something greater than ourselves. I miss PL, yes I do. I miss the place and I miss the people in it. I do miss being reckless and wild and free of inhibitions.

I do want to go back to when I was younger. I want to kiss and say goodbye to a million boys. I want to skip classes every Wednesday and buy MCs every week. I want to fall madly in love and not ever commit. I do want to throw all the responsiblities I have now into someone's face and shirk it all. I want to drop out of school and yet, get a job and earn a million a month. I want to hook a rich old dude and spend a million a second. Oh yes, if God had long cut off that leash that's reining in my every fleshly desire, that's what I'd set out to do.

But God has yet to allow us to give in to our flesh. Neither has He allowed the invention of a time machine to take place. He must have His reasons, I guess. So all we can do is pray for our eyes to be opened to the bigger picture. LOL, Dee, death still sounds like a very sweet release to me, but not just yet :) I think we're meant for something greater than our "Let's Die Tomorrow" scheme.

**

I was reminded of how much I want to excel in life and provide a comfortable life for my Mum. I was reminded how many atimes I want to throw in the towel and take the wider road, one for easy travelling. I was reminded of who has been the one driving me. I was reminded of how I have grown the past few years. I was reminded of my destiny awaiting me.

And for all these reminders to never be reminders again but as what I will always bear in mind, as my priorities in life.

"God. Mummy. Love life. (as in love my own life)"

**

Anyway, here's something really hilarious and reason enough why I love having Shijie around :)

"Siewling, could you stop that?! Stop mentally undressing my potato... And don't bother hitting me. A ball of fats can't do much to a mass of muscle... What do you mean, what muscle? I can do 14 pull-ups okay? 14!... Oh you should try the Grilled Chicken Foldover at Macs. It only contains 8g of fat. 8 grams, Siewling!... (as we pass by a closed bank with a lit sign) Tell you, banks take all their profits and waste it all on their electricity bills... Siewling, you know what? I bet, that when people talk to you, they're just looking at your hair and not at your face. And when they tell you they love you, they're like, I don't know, blind or something... You should dye your hair, you look like a black-and-white TV set in a world of colour TVs... Siewling, you're damn retarded. Could you stop that?! Stop whining. Not cool. Totally not cool."

Why do we have the most moronic conversations with some of our most intelligent friends?

HAHAHA!
Great week ahead! :D :D
Amen

2006-10-08T17:07:00.000+08:00

The sound of your laughter &
The way you smile :D

My friend asked me a very innocent question yesterday and I didn't have a proper answer for it. Still feeling quite dumb for not being able to answer but even till now, I haven't found an answer. Silly and Sally has uncovered many life's greatest mysteries: why actives are called actives, that there is no specific right time for anything at all, that life gets worse everyday, the Beauty and the Beast theory and that some questions are not meant to be answered or have no answers to them. That was one of which. But there's something I want you to know and that is, come what may, I will try my best to listen to your heart and show you how much I am beginning to care for you. You entering my life has made a difference you can never imagine. Thankyouverymuch :)

Here's what my tutee wrote in his exercise book when trying to form a sentence with the word "freeze"
The snow freeze the man into a snowman.

Lol, should I laugh or should I cry?

2006-10-07T01:08:00.000+08:00

Let me say something: Wow.
You managed to make me feel happy on this sad day without saying anything.
Let me say it backwards: .woW (SIEWLING!! HAHAHAHA!!)

It's Mid Autumn but I don't see the full moon anywhere at all because the sky is not even dark, it is grey, it has been polluted ): Now I feel like how I used to feel in the past when I had the breathing shit plus headache and heartache and all so today sucked. But toevening was fine because after cellgroup we wenta Grapevine to chill out and yeah the Oreo Frappe everyone gives a thumbsup for is really good :D :D

(people inside joined our photos in the background! FUNNY SIAL!)

So let's end the horrible day with a nice sleep

Hold on to our hands and don't ever let us go okay? :)
WE LOVE YOU
I won't let you let go of me!

2006-10-06T11:38:00.000+08:00

You played a big part.
You held my hand and led me to where you were.
Give me a chance to hold your hand.

Life does not change but people change.
Life can't choose who to live for but people can choose how to live life.

2006-10-05T17:16:00.000+08:00

She was telling me about how this year has been a year of thorough change in most of us. She asked me to take time and read my archives. I really did change tremedously. The way I led life in the first half of the year and now, life in the later half of the year is indeed very different. My outlook on love, people and life has also changed. (I sound like I fell out of love, lol maybe I did) I don't know which one of myself I prefer. But all I know is I'm glad that I've advanced and maybe that's reason enough for me to like the new me.

One of the things that I picked up this year and will bring along with me in this race of life is that this is truly a race. In every race, majority of the people would have targetted in their hearts to complete it faster than the rest and come in tops, others may just have a goal of not coming in last and a minority with a specific target to attain regardless of what position they come in as. This small group of people are most probably the more seasoned experienced ones. There's this poster in the school canteen that says "You've completed the race. You come in 14790th" with a very jubilant runner probably feeling very satisfied :)

Strength of my heart, teach me to be like that runner. Teach me to be contented as long as I achieve my personal goals. I don't want to outrun others, I just want to outrun myself because I know how it feels to try too hard and fall flat on my butt from the 999th story. I had to start from the 1st floor all over again. I don't want that to happen again.

2006-10-04T17:17:00.000+08:00

Yesterday after my GP and MT paper, Shijie and Siewling came over to my crib! LOL :) :) It was really great to spend the evening with them the way we did and lol, I can't wait to hang out with you guys and the rest of 89 even more :D SHIJIE HAS THE ABILITY TO MAKE ANYONE LAUGH. He sure has some EQ

Shijie: (maximized a picture and focused on _______'s faces)
Delia, I know you like this right, so cuteeeeee!
Siewling: _______ looks like he's in pain lah
Shijie: (scrolls down, away from the face and found himself at the end of the photo where _______'s legs were)
Delia: WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO?!!
Shijie: I'm trying to see if someone was stepping on him
Siewling and Delia: (ROLLS ON FLOOR LAUGHING)
Delia: No, it's because _______ stole his Winnie the Pooh
Siewling and Shijie: (LAUGHS OUT LOUD)

**

Shijie found fabric paint amazing and cool so he requested for me to write the following on his shirt: "Siewling is SEXY" and "Delia is HOT" (HURH!) So I did! And when it dried and everything, we wanted to take a photo of it

Siewling: Eh, pose and let me take leh
Shijie: (sticks the sleeve into the camera)
Delia: NOOO! Take both sleeves together! You must put your arms together
Shijie: (tries putting his arms together in many different ways)
Siewling: Maybe you have to flex?
Shijie: Flex what?
Siewling: Good point
Delia and Siewling: (laughs)
Shijie: Aiya, forget it lah (takes his shirt off and stuck it into Siewling's face)
Delia and Siewling: OH MY GOODNESS CAN YOU PLEASE PUT IT ON?!!!
Shijie: What? Nevermind lah, hurry take
Siewling: Don't want lah please (sticks it back into his face)

Sheesh -__________-!!

haha, weetards ;D

2006-10-02T00:48:00.000+08:00

Spent my Childrens' Day evening at the wuding with my most bimbotic friend and funniest friend ever - Lings and Shijie respectively :D :D AND I BECAME THE CAUSE OF ALL THE LAUGHTER IN THE WORLD [with no where to hide my face ): ] Thanks ah, Grandpa!

V.I.P: Happy Childrens' Day! :) :)

Never let my heart grow cold, never let it go

2006-10-01T00:03:00.000+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4

After watching the video, I realised that I'm very stingy with hugs. For the record, I've only willingly thought of plus offered a hug to Evon and Siewling, even though I know hugs do have the ability to make someone feel so much better. The reason I defend myself with is that this will only make my hugs more meaningful and precious, hah! I should admit it's because I dare not offer knowing how unexpressive I can get at times :/

2006-09-30T12:16:00.000+08:00

Yesterday Alex told me that Soundtrack For Our Movie - MAE was used as a soundtrack for some gay show. I was so shocked I had nothing to say. LOL! And he questioned the kind of bands I listen to, like are they gay or something? -_______- So I played praise for cellgroup yesterday and it was abnormal. Well, guess I have to start from Day 1 all over again because when something is lost once, you can't expect it to be usual when you get it again. Just be glad the chance came back and keep going, yeah. And Grandpa Shijie with a very delighted grimace flashing across his face every moment, has officially ended his promos and is going to start revising for Alevels. MAN, I WANT IT TO END TOOOOOOOOO

Anyway I foresee that with the implementation of the new timetable for these two weeks, it gives me an added reason for me to cut classes/school especially on Fridays! Heh heh!

It pains us to see you like that

2006-09-28T16:51:00.000+08:00

I know, I know, while other people are going to end their promos in a few days time, only then will my first two papers commence. Going to school everyday and having the teachers drill into your brain that is already dead that its in 5 days to GP and Chinese and 18 days to the core subjects, you feel so tensed up and jittery so you promise yourself to head home and forget about the afternoon nap you've been craving and start revision. But you know, the leopard never changes its spots and those of you who has known me for very long should know that I'm an extremely lazy bummer and a procrastinator. Welcome to the world of Delia. Lol! And feeling stressed but not doing anything about it makes me even more stressed. I being such a foodie has been downing everything I see in my house -_________-

Okay, and another thing about me is that I like to daydream. I like to think about things that I can't do now (or have a reason not to now). So I started listing out some activities I MUST head out to do after the promos

#1. Meet Bestfriend and the clique
#2. Meet Tanya Tangy and Margt
#3. Meet Rhubini Ryna and Vivien
#4. Meet Zong
#5. Overnight fishing
#6. Movie marathon
#7. Ton at the airport
#8. Chalet
#9. Walk to nowhere in mind for a whole day
#10. Overnight or just biking
#11. Skip school 1240345325 times
#12. Sleep 10 hours a day
#13. Take bus trips to nowhere consecutively
#14. Shopping
#15. Hide my notes in a box and under my platform so I will never see it again
#16. Learn how to rollerblade
#17. Hibernate at home
#18. Kite-flying
#19. Play frisbee
#20. Go kayaking
#21. Swim
#22. Stop studying forever and ever and ever..

But the problem is I haven't even started studying so how can I stop studying? Damnit! LOL. Okay lah, here's an incentive Delia: 22 more days and you can wreck havoc :) :) So you better get started!

2006-09-27T21:30:00.000+08:00

Most of the other JCs has started their promotional examinations so here's a shout out to all my friends who are in the midst of this nerve wrecking period, remember this song we used to sing back in PL :D :D

With Christ in the vessal we can smile at the storm!

Bestfriend, Tingster, Annabel, Rhubini, Ryna, Vivian, Weijing, and all of you guys will be in my prayers :) Trust in Him to lead you through

2006-09-26T22:23:00.000+08:00

Hello hello!

I gave school a miss today and headed down to my Wife's crib in the morning. We talked for hours and ended up dozing off. After what-seemed-like 10 minutes later, she screamed "OH AM GEE, IT'S 1.45PM!" then she started scampering about. I left her to get ready and went back to slumber. Half an hour later, she woke me up and then we cabbed down to her tutee's place. I went to RPlaza macs and did some Math. My brain was freezen! It was so cold that I said frozen as freezen. So I stoned. I froze.

Haha :) Broke fast together and we spent the evening talking and talking. Anyway thankyou once again for helping me with Literature. You should sit for all my Literature papers sial!

Okay yay, I officially still have 5 more days to self-declare :D :D Heh heh!

---

When your good friend keeps questioning you, when she keeps doing promotions by sending songs like "Too Good To Be - New Found Glory", when she keeps reiterating that you should not let it go just like that, all you can do is to keep in mind whatever she has been saying and be thankful that there's someone like her to rationalize whatever you think. Yet, don't let her become your subconscious and let her override your mind. DON'T!!

Sorry, I dare not try

2006-09-26T00:49:00.000+08:00

Ripped from Na's

I've Done 67 Out Of 125 Crazy Things!

Level 1

( ) smoked a cigarette

( ) smoked a cigar

( ) done weed

( ) kissed a member of the same sex

(x) drank alcohol

SO FAR: 1

Level 2

() been in love

() been dumped

(x) shoplifted

() been fired

(x) been in a fist fight

SO FAR: 3

Level 3

(X) snuck out of a parent's house

(X) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back

( ) been arrested

( ) made out with a stranger

(X) gone out on a blind date

SO FAR: 6

Level 4

(X) had a crush on an older person

(X) skipped school

() slept with a co-worker

(X) seen someone/something die

SO FAR: 9

Level 5

( ) had/have a crush on one of your FRIENDSTER friends

( ) been to Paris

( ) been to Spain

(X) been on a plane

( ) thrown up from drinking

SO FAR: 10

Level 6

(X) eaten Sushi

( ) been snowboarding

( ) met someone BECAUSE of myspace

( ) been mosh pitting

SO FAR: 11

Level 7

() been in an abusive relationship

(x) taken pain killers

(x) love/like someone right now

(x) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes goby

() made a snow angel

SO FAR: 14

Level 8

(x) had a tea party

(x) flown a kite

(x) built a sand castle

(x) gone puddle jumping

(x) played dress up

SO FAR: 19

Level 9

(x) jumped into a pile of leaves

() gone sledding

(x) cheated while playing a game

(x) been lonely

(x) fallen asleep at work/school

SO FAR: 23

Level 10

(x) used a fake/someone else's ID

(x) watched the sun set

() felt an earthquake

() killed a snake

SO FAR: 25

Level 11

(x) been tickled

(x) been robbed/vandalized

() robbed someone

(x) been misunderstood

() pet a reindeer

SO FAR: 28

Level 12

(x) won a contest

( ) been suspended from school

(x) had detention

( ) been in a car/motorcycle accident

SO FAR: 30

Level 13

() had/have braces

(x) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night

(x) had deja vu

() danced in the moonlight

SO FAR: 32

Level 14

( ) hated the way you look

(x) witnessed a crime

( ) pole danced

(x) questioned your heart

(x) been obsessed with post-it notes

SO FAR: 35

Level 15

(x) squished barefoot through the mud

(x) been lost

() been to the opposite side of the world

(x) swam in the ocean

(x) felt like you were dying

SO FAR: 39

Level 16

(x) cried yourself to sleep

(x) played cops and robbers

(x) recently coloured with crayons/coloredpencils/markers

(x) sang karaoke

(x) paid for a meal with only coins

SO FAR: 44

Level 17

(x) done something you told yourself you wouldn't

(x) made prank phone calls

() laughed until some kind of beverage came outof your nose

() kissed in the rain

SO FAR: 46

Level 18

(x) written a letter to Santa Clause (haha! RICK :D )

() been kissed under a mistletoe

(x) watched the sun set with someone you care/cared about

(X) blown bubbles

(X) made a bonfire on the beach

SO FAR: 50

Level 19

(x) crashed a party

() have traveled more than 5 days with a car full ofpeople

() gone roller skating/ blading

(x) had a wish come true

() humped a monkey

SO FAR: 52

Level 20

(x) worn pearls

(X) jumped off a bridge

( ) screamed "penis" at a football game.

( ) swimming with dolphins

SO FAR: 53

Level 21

(x) got your tongue stuck to a pole/freezer/ice cube

(x ) kissed a fish

(x) worn the opposite sex clothes

(x) Sat on a roof top (SM:)E)

SO FAR: 57

Level 22

(x) screamed at the top of your lungs

(x) can do/done a one-handed cartwheel (in the past)

(x) talked on the phone for more than 3 hours

(x) stayed up all night

SO FAR: 61

Level 23

(x) picked and ate an apple right off the tree (Aussie)

(x) climbed a tree

(x) had/been in a tree house

(x) aren't scared to watch scary movies alone

SO FAR: 65

Level 24

(x) believe in ghosts

(x) have/had more then 30 pairs of shoes

( ) gone streaking

( ) been in jail

SO FAR: 67

2006-09-24T02:25:00.000+08:00

I'll play for you

I KNOW I AM INFECTED BY FOOLISHNESS, I KNOW! And it seems like I kind of miss this feeling that's why am actually enjoying it now albeit making it more foolish. Lol :) Ohwell, at least it's a good sign - I'm normal. Haha!

God speaks through many ways. He speaks through people in your life. He can tell you how lovely you are, He can advise you to rethink your decisions, He can remind you of what you have forgotten, He can comfort you when you cry and He can reassure you of what you are doing. That's why some people are God-sent. They do not need to be by your side all the time. Neither do they need to hear from your mouth how you are feeling exactly. These people will just appear all of a sudden and whatever they say will just make you feel so much better. Sometimes these people are just not those you think would come by to make your day but they just have the ability to and they don't know it. Similarly, when you are God-sent to others, you'll never realise it. That just by one simple sentence, someone's life can take a turn towards the narrow path, the one that does not lead to destruction.

Cindy spotted me in church and we caught up in a little while. It felt so nice to hug her. It was so good to tell her everything. I remembered how she has seen every bit of me, accepted me for all my weaknesses and how she never failed to be part of every season in my life, even for a very short moment, they still made a difference. I really respect her for her courage and her love for people. Such is a discipler whom I will never forget and will always look up to.

Thankyou :)

I made a decision to leave them there, where they left. People come and go. People come and go. A fresh anointing awaits me and it's time I take it forward.

2006-09-23T01:25:00.000+08:00

Warm and fuzzy!

I never knew writing a letter to someone you have been feeling negative emotions towards would be useful to help you realise that yes, hidden deep under all these anger/hurt/fear/regret/intentions, you actually do love this person fondly and never want to lose sight of this person in your life. We wrote letters to a particular someone today and my hands just led me to direct it to you. I found myself writing in circles, after every point I made, it led me back to the first point - it's just me selfishly hoping and wishing that you had been and still will be an essential part of my life, that my younger days would have been happier and whenever I wanted a piggyback, I would have gotten it. The letter came to a point where it was time for me to express my love. Yet, I found it to be such an uphill task to write those three words and even write a simple five letter word to address you.

Dear -----,

(blah blah blah)

It is my intention that you will not continue to be someone who finds difficulty in trusting people, someone who doesn't give others chances to enter the door of your heart, someone who seems so nonchalant towards everything but is actually hoping to be able to come through one day. Do understand that there are many people who do care for you so open up your heart and let them in please?

(blah blah blah)

Love,
Delia

Try it, it works! :)

---

Teo: I like having dinner with you because I enjoy your company. It is only when we are alone together do we get to talk amicably and relate honestly. I just wanted you to know that you're a really nice person and don't hide that side of yourself from others, okay? Meet you again!

Seet: No matter how lousy and crummy you feel, you have me :D :D You know how I can make you laugh and smile till you cry just with one sentence. Haha, thanks for being there for me everytime I need you! Thankyou for (taboo five latter word)ing me :)

Ong: Oh man, the past few weeks in school has been endurable because of you, Chua and Cheng. Good to have you guys everyday! Looking forward to complete our mission coming weeek! Hahahaha

2006-09-20T19:54:00.000+08:00

http://www.lightamillioncandles.com/

Project Work Group Project Proposal:
Allow a break for power naps thrice a week in the school curriculum

Comments from examiner:
Brilliant idea!

2006-09-19T19:12:00.000+08:00

Was on the bus back from school today and I saw a familiar face on the road, waiting for the lights to turn green. It was Kairen! Lol :) So weird because we were like two arms length away from each other but I was on the bus and he on the "ground" but we could have missed each other if I didn't look out of the window. Then I texted him and yada.

Well, it's so beautifully amazing how and why we meet people for different reasons. We often don't realise that there are many someones out there whom we have yet to know personally but may have already seen them. We also find ourselves not understanding why we have come to know them. I for one believe that every person in my life has been placed there for a reason and regardless if that person is here to teach me a life lesson or to make me feel special or remind me how fortunate I really am or to be there for me when I need someone or just be a bridge to let me know someone else, I'm sure it is for my betterment :)

So here's a shout out to every single one of you whom has crossed paths with me: Thank you for being part of my life :D :D I treasure every single one of you!

Is it because I see him in you?

2006-09-18T23:43:00.000+08:00

Quick to listen
Slow to speak
Slow to anger

Something I scribbled on my Math tutorial and it helped me through the day. Admit I was a little short fused ): Can't wait for midweek to come and fly away!

2006-09-18T00:23:00.000+08:00

To see your smile and eyes light up :)

I'm so glad I spent my weekend the way I did. Although I didn't do much work and have yet to complete my revision for the Econs test tomorrow, I still feel so accomplished at 0019hr Monday. I've found the reason for me to stretch my limits, the reason for me to care for others beyond my lethargy, the reason for me to lend a hand regardless of my agenda, the reason for me to love. He has empowered my heart another hundredfold. I'm stronger than I was yesterday :D :D And my spirit takes a leap of joy!

2006-09-17T01:40:00.000+08:00

Your eyes tells me that you do
My heart skipped 1240343285 beats

So what is love, really. Will we realise it when it is here? What if we don't, will we just let it slip by? What will happen if it just slips by?

Siewling, you better not slip okay. Please dont? You will be bruised ): I miss you, my Wife! (once again inspired by WZX) Seeyou tomorrow!

Not all questions are asked to be answered

2006-09-15T23:46:00.000+08:00

(Here's a mushy wushy part just for my wife, Siewling. Inspired by Zongxia's lovely (pun) blog!)
Disclaimer: They are in inverted commas

"My darling Sally, I never thought I'ld meet someone like you. There are countless girls like you out there and sometimes I do wonder why I chose you. Well, I think this is what they call love. It's not the kind of puppy love kids feel nor is it the for-fun kind. I'm sure it's not the floaty feeling because she only makes my hair stand all the time. Zongxia says that you'll only understand it when you're into it. Maybe this is it. Lings, I'm so glad I found you! Oh and do get well soon! Seeyou tomorrow :)"

AHAHAHAHAH! It is damn tiring to type all these things lah. Zongxia, how do you do it? Is it really what they call, the power of LOVE? Lol :) Anyway Happy Fifth/Sixth Month!! :D :D

---

Anyway the day was good! Mayhaps had an overdose of the best medicine on Earth - laughter :) A conversation between Xiangjie and I about me embarrassing them today. Lol, FUNNY SIAL!

Dee says:
HAHAHAHA!
Dee says:
i "bullied" two big bullies today
Dee says:
GARY DING AND ONG XIANGJIE
you think he thought who confirm?? says:
WE WILL NOT TAKE THIS LYING DOWN
you think he thought who confirm?? says:
WE WILL RISE UP ONCE AGAIN
Dee says:
lol
Dee says:
FANG MA GUO LAI
you think he thought who confirm?? says:
ni deng zhe qiao
Dee says:
:)
you think he thought who confirm?? says:
ni bie de yi

You're so good to me

2006-09-14T16:38:00.000+08:00

Stop taking things into your own hands because you will end up ruining them. Seems like it's happening. Sorry for the complications caused.

Don't take too long to say I love you
But I just can't let it out of my mouth :/

2006-09-13T21:00:00.000+08:00

Friend, you're the greatest blessing I've ever had
You're also the greatest blessing I've ever had and I don't want to be just your friend
Okay okay, you're Spiderman!

2006-09-12T19:47:00.000+08:00

Sitting and wondering
"Do you think of me like how I think of you?"

Yesterday was my cousin's birthday. (Shes' probably the only cousin I'm close to and we're not exactly cousins either.) Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DENISE! :D :D Well, we've been supposed to meet for a shopping trip and catchup since 1350355925 years ago but I've been pushing it further and further away. So happened that there were last minute arrangements for us to meet up for dinner yesterday on her birthday itself, awwh man! Lol! And I, being the person I always am, didn't check my phone till after training. Got a big shock to find a thousand missed calls and two thousand unread messages. Seems like they've been trying to contact me since 4something (but I remember checking my phone at 4something during Lit tut leh :/) and they thought I didn't want to meet up (who says!). Managed to rush down to Airport Sakae after training (yes, sticky and stinky especially after dawning the goalie suit!) and had a good meal with her, her Mum and my Mum :)

A topic that we dwelt upon throughout the whole meal was about the salvation of the older people in my extended family. My maternal grandmother and all my Mum's siblings are serving in church actively for quite some time already. But not on their side, most of the uncles and aunties are saved but not attending church regularly. The granduncles and grandaunties have been to church and have witnessed how big God is but their doubt: What makes us, Christians, so sure that we'll definitely go to Heaven?

Faith is a substance for the things hoped for, proof of the things unseen
I'll be seeing you in Heaven :)

2006-09-10T17:41:00.000+08:00

You're a dream I pray would come true :)

Had my first try at giving tuition this morning. I was really excited to meet the boy (knowing how paedophilic I can get and Sheena told me that he's very adorable) He isn't all that cute but still good looking. Lol, I was expecting JJ Wilson kind of cute! Went through with him some English conversation exercises and passages and after we did some Math assessement. (lol, IF ONLY AO MATH IS OF THAT STANDARD!!) He was actually counting the number of pages of work he did and told me that he already exceeded the allocated "5 pages" for the day. HAHAHA! Reminds me of myself in Kindergarden. Thereafter my Mum got so busy with work and had no time to check on me, all the assessment books we bought were found in mint condition even upon graduation (reads: Primary and Secondary school)! Haha :D :D

Overall a good experience and I look forward to stretching myself this coming term, juggling with CCA, revision for promos, being a tutor, committing to cellgroup/church and having a good social life :) Here's welcoming Term 4 with a positive attitude and a heart for Him. Amen!

Psalm 68:35
You are awesome, O God, in your sanctuary; the God of Israel gives power and strength to His people. Praise be to God!

2006-09-09T23:01:00.000+08:00

It was like my heart was ripped apart and salt was rubbed into it. It hurt so bad, I weeped. Haven't I born enough as it already has been? Why make it worse? Then You took my heart and replaced it with Yours. I love, because You first loved me. I live, because of what You gave. You died, showed me how to live. You're the life in me.

And what can this world offer?
When all I desire is You

Like a combination of them all;
It's been awhile since I felt like that for someone :D

2006-09-09T00:38:00.000+08:00

I've had a couple of rat encounters in Sengkang of late. CRAPPPP!! Darn gross. I was at RPlaza and from the corner of my eye, I saw something long and squiggly creeping through the bushes (I knew straight away what it was). Then I looked harder and realised that it wasn't one but THREE freaking rats, sizes 3, 5 and 6. Must be a whole family of them :/ And then when I went home, I saw this monstrous cat that has been dwelling in our peaceful and clean neighbourhood lying dead on the floor. Mark my words when I say monstrous. I bet it was that huge because it has been feeding on countless size 2401358035 rats. The thought of it grosses me out. Erks. And just now, I saw another one. It looks fiercer than the dead one and it looked ready to eat 7000 more rats. I hate cats. I hate rats.

It was worth it :)
(no, not the cats and the rats!! haha)
You rock! :D :D

2006-09-07T10:16:00.000+08:00

I'm so happy I've got friends who can make me lighten up so much just with their company :D :D I daresay this September holidays has been good (ignore the unhappiness and be joyful!)

Sunday, 0309

If only everyday was just me and two wheels. Thank you Little RTan!

Wednesday, 0609

Teo being himself -____-

Sally and I :)

The poly kids

Yup, we stayed overnight at the airport :) It was freezing like mad and I had to use two sweaters (I love Shijie's pullover!) Teo's notebook was so distracting. We played computer games and watched movies. Lings agrees that the PacificCoffee guy is damnit cute. Shijie is so retardedly erhm, ahpeh? Hahaha! We went everywhere to use their power supply and made everywhere our home. Letty dropped by in the morning with breakfast she made specially for us :) And Sheena stayed till late with us just to make sure we were safe, haha! Methink their company was great and that we should do this over and over again end of year :D :D Next stop, Teo's crib!

It's 11.12am, I better go sleep

2006-09-04T21:22:00.000+08:00

Today sucked. I remember that you used to tell me to smile my best on a day like that. Not today, not anymore. So often I find myself asking, why why why. But today I heard myself asking when. When will all these things end? Will I ever come to the day when it will end? Is this it, my longest bicycle ride ever, that will never cross the finishing line? After all our exchanging of hurtful and snide remarks all the time, my thoughts stop in their tracks and I come to a painful realisation that actually, what I've always wanted I will never get, who I always whined for I will never feel and who I always hoped to be I will never be. I guess you think you won't affect me anymore.

Your mercy taught me to forgive

2006-09-04T01:42:00.000+08:00

It's time-out!

I should stop having such high expectations of people around me. Instead of expecting them to meet my expectations, I should learn how to do the opposite. But for now, before I have learnt how to, (I apologise for my blunt dismissal) let's take a break.

2006-09-03T13:04:00.000+08:00

Ripped off Bestfriend's

Seven RANDOM facts about me:
-I can have an ideal breakfast for a perfect dinner
-I only drink greentea/coffee/carrotjuice in school
-I am still growing
-I like my things to be seasoned and look old/used
-I like to stay at home all day
-I can watch some shows over and over again and not get sick of them
-I enjoy making people laugh :D :D

Seven things that scare me:
-LIGHTNING & THUNDER
-RATS, damnit
-People crying ):
-Being absentminded
-Losing my things
-Papercuts
-RATS RATS RATS

Seven favourite songs:
-Better Together - Jack Johnson
-Awake - Secondhand Serenade
-Drugs Or Me - Jimmy Eat World
-Let It Roll - Secondhand Serenade
-This Never Happened Before - Paul McCartney
-The Fear You Won't Fall - Joshua Radin
-Day Late Friend - Anberlin

Seven things I like most:
-TULIPS!! :)
-Honey Stars, heh
-gummies
-Guylian!
-my poddy
-Honeydew
-Loads of time for slacking

Seven people to do this:
THE SEVEN PEOPLE I MEET IN HEAVEN!
HAHA. [Bestie, actually I was thinking about this too x) ]

2006-09-03T00:49:00.000+08:00

I believe platonic. You?

Hello! It's been awhile since I last blogged a proper entry. Here's sparing all of you endless posting of memes and lyrics from songs that have been ringing in my head.

I've got alot of things to say but I don't know where to start. One thing I know for sure is that I've been a very confused person of late and have found my feelings contradicting whatever I say/do. WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THE USUALLY RATIONAL ME?!! :/

My soul cries out for more of You

2006-09-01T17:19:00.000+08:00

It is always difficult to get started with something
It gets even more difficult to end it well
--

We have to think it through
I'm starting to wander off

2006-08-30T20:48:00.000+08:00

Ripped off Daryl's

Turn on your iPod and put it on shuffle. For every question, press "next song". Enter title to answer the question.

1. How does the world see me?
One Last Breath - Creed

2. Will I have a happy life?
Save Me - Corrinne May [ :D ]

3. What do my friends really think of me?
The Way You Look At Me - Christian Bautista [LOLL?!! Awwh..]

4. Do people secretly lust after me?
Sunny Day - Jars Of Clay

5. How can you be happy?
Angels Brought Me Here - Guy Sebastian

6. What should I do with my life?
I Just Don't Love You No More - Craig David [HA HA HA -______- ]

7. Why must life be so full of pain?
Collide - Dishwalla [Now we know why.. "when we collide, we break"]

8. Will I ever have children?
Finally See - (not saying) [no answer but only memories]

9. Will I die Happy?
Unlike Me - Kate Havenvik [ hmm, :/ ]

10. What is good advice for me?
Lonely People - Augustana

11. What is Happiness?
Take Me Away - Lifehouse [perhaps]

12. Whats my favourite fetish?
I Could Have Danced All Night - Jamie Cullum [dancing is so not me!]

13. How will I be remembered?
Epilogue - MAE [lol!]

14.What is your love life like?
Feel So Free - Ivy

15. What is your life motto?
More Than Anyone - Gavin DeGraw

16. What do your parents think of you?
Walk Alone - Jack Johnson [yeah, independent is my middle name (: ]

17. What is my favourite hobby?
Get It Faster - Jimmy Eat World

18. What does your best friend really think of you?
Maybe I'm Amazed - Jem [ :D ]

19. Whats the worst thing about you?
Catch My Disease - Ben Lee [yeah, sometimes]

20.Describe your mind.
Perfect Day - Hoku [and I'm still waiting]

21. How will you die?
The Last Song Ever - Secondhand Serenade [uhhh]

22. How does your crush feel about you?
Someone Else's Life - Joshua Radin [lol, how nice?]

23. How is your wedding going to be like?
Time & Confusion - Anberlin

24. What about your honeymoon?
Creeps In The Stone - Dishwalla

25. Describe the last day of your life...
To Be Alone With You - Sufjan Stevens ["to be alone, with you"]

26. Why does life suck?
I For You - Luna Sea [damnit, WHYY THIS SONG?!! its true for now, I guess]

27. Why does life rule?
Beautiful - Jason Mraz [because there're singers like Jason Mraz! :) ]

28. What will you be famous for?
Fortress - Pinback

29. What is the craziest thing you will ever do?
Smile Like You Mean It - The Killers

30. Will you achieve your goals?
My Beautiful Friend - Guy Sebastian

31. What will your future job be like?
The Reason Why - Rachael Yamagata

32. And your Party life?
Say It Isn't So - Gareth Gates

33. Overall, will you be happy?
Soundtrack For Our Movie - MAE [YAYY! "I'm directing the scene that has you and me forever"]

34. Or will you just cope with it?
Embers and Envelopes - MAE

2006-08-29T20:59:00.000+08:00

I don't know who you are
I feel different in your eyes
All I know is it happens every time
The way you look at me

2006-08-29T20:37:00.000+08:00

Ripped off Sop's blog (:

How many windows do you have in your room?
# one
What is the color of your walls?
# yellow! :D
Hardwood floor, tile, or carpet?
# hardwood
Do you get ready for the day in your room or toilet?
# both
What type of closet do you have?
# built-in with two full length mirrors x)
What size bed do you have?
# single
Is your room big?
# nope, small and comfy
Is it clean?
# once in a while..
What is your bedroom view out the window?
#
What is your favorite part of your room?
# my platform! and of course my bed :D :D

Do you have the following in your room:
[x] desk
[x] cell phone
[ ] chair
[ ] book shelf
[ ] dresser
[ ] TV
[ ] computer
[ ] bean bag (I WANTTTT!! Been wanting to get it since I shifted in..)
[x] pictures
[x] mirror
[x] bed
[x] stuffed animal(s)
[ ] drumset
[x] clothes on the floor (i quite like the feeling of it, haha)
[ ] plastic flamingo
[x] guitar(s)
[ ] lava lamp
[ ] smoke detector
[ ] piano/keyboard
[x] locking door
[ ] can of soda
[x] bottle of water
[x] a blacklight
[x] something about your own country
[ ] medals/ribbons
[x] trophies
[x] awards
[ ] water polo ball
[ ] soccer ball
[ ] volleyball
[x] basketball
[ ] softball stuff
[ ] track gear
[ ] frisbee
[ ] beach ball
[ ] football
[ ] tennis ball
[x] hockey stuff
[ ] lacrosse stick
[x] cds
[ ] sofa/futon/round chair
[ ] bottles of liquor
[ ] flag
[x] stop sign/any sign
[ ] caution tape
[ ] paintball gun
[ ] airsoft gun
[ ] Real Gun
[ ] cigarettes
[ ] Snowboard
[ ] Wakeboard
[ ] Skateboard
[x] Stereo
[x] books
[x] trash can
[x] swimming goggles
[x] jacket
[ ] pet
[x] clock

2006-08-28T22:13:00.000+08:00

I'm defenseless
And I know it's late but I am waiting
For the moment that I've been anticipating
And I signal you to go where it will take us I don't know

You are telling me that I should take a chance

2006-08-27T01:18:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIEWLING!

I really stand in awe at how God has moved our friendship up level after levels for the past few years. Regardless of what we thought of each other back in Sec1, what we share today is really larger than life.

Level 1: The Neoprint crazy phase
Level 2: Sharing holiday homework answers through scanned answers. Then create websites after websites.
Level 3: Sharing the same girlfriend of a husband who we fondly address as PapaCow hence people knowing us as the MamaCows
Level 4: PC
Level 5: After I found my way back to Christ, He led me to take you on a ride through the Only Way.
Level 6: Being classmates and cellmates together was difficult. We saw each other everyday and it was tough rising up as a helper while looking after a close friend.
Level 7: Me leaving you alone because of a fall.
Level 8: When we broke down during English enrichment
Level 9: CWB and SClique
Level 10: My bad once again, but you not giving me up
Level 11 (Preview): The stage of independence, where we individually find The One

Thankyou, for the greater glories to come :)

And friends are friends forever..

2006-08-27T00:52:00.000+08:00

Tagged by Jiahe

SEVEN ways people can attract my attention

#1 Smile at me
#2 Special aura
#3 Look like someone I've seen before
#4 Look like someone I know
#5 Have extraordinary features (super tall, interesting hairdos etc.)
#6 Have common interests/traits as me
#7 Behave barbarically

--
I tag anyone who reads this :)

--

STEPHANIE-
1. Nice hair and handphone
2. Go for your Malay lessons! :D
3. Black
4. Your friendliness!
5. From Evergreen Sec and in the Green Club
6. Butterflies (: (:
7. Your throat will get well soon right? (takecare!)

2006-08-26T01:55:00.000+08:00

And I thought my heart would stop beating by the end of today
God really pulled me through, Hallelujah!

2006-08-24T23:50:00.000+08:00

SALEM-
1. (cough cough) I'm sick today
2. Stand up in the middle of Spencer's tut
3. Navy green :)
4. Your humour! and wit
5. You being all cool and calm when I tried to make friends
6. Cat
7. Did you really slide away when we first talked? LOL

JULIN-
1. Green pencil, green jacket, green notebook, green wallet, green food (oops!)
2. Ask Laoshi if he has an english name
3. GREEEEN
4. Your laughter and thoughtfulness :D
5. That girl with a really cool name
6. Erps, cow? :P
7. How did we become friends like now? Anyway, I'm glad we have!

ZONGXIA-
1. Hazelnut Chocolate, taken!
2. Buy me a box of chocolates, AHAA
3. RED
4. Your nagginess, really!
5. The prefect from primary school who seems like a perfectionist
6. Hamster
7. What made us start bickering non-stop back then uh?

VIVIEN-
1. Basketball. Guitar. Hockey.
2. Play hockey with a floorball, with me? haha
3. Orange
4. Your can-do nature :)
5. Cathleen's bestfriend, lol!
6. Rabbit
7. Do you love shoes now? :D :D

2006-08-21T22:50:00.000+08:00

Will never imagined he would live past this day. He thought about her for every moment of the day. Thinking and wondering what this special day had brought for her. What did she do? Who did she spend it with? Did she enjoy herself? Is she going to end the day, happy? Has he, for even a split second, crossed her mind?

It was the first time, ever, that somebody reminded him it was her birthday. Was it God playing a trick on his emotions? Well, at least the day is about to end. All these things would reach a halt. Wait, who is he trying to kid?

You wore the shirt I gave you, on the 21st. Does that mean you did think of me or at least, thought of me? I should be feeling elated..

2006-08-21T22:35:00.000+08:00

JOANNE-
1. TALL AND LOVING WOMAN :)
2. Perm your hair, you'll look awesome!
3. NAVY GREEN!
4. Your faithfulness and trust in God
5. "My, she's quite similar to Yunli.."
6. Rabbit
7. Do you think I'll be as tall as you one day? :D

JIAHE-
1. DOTA MONSTERKILL
2. Play DOTA for 3 days and 2 nights non-stop (bet you'll get sick of it)
3. Black because of your bag
4. Your humor
5. The guy who plays table tennis and wears a smarty pants
6. Bird
7. Do you know how much you've spent on DOTA already? lol :)

2006-08-20T11:40:00.000+08:00

LINGS-
1. My favourite Bimbo :) Yup, let's get married!
2. Go to church without styling your hair
3. Gold because of your new bag
4. The way you make me feel that even if the World caved in, there'll be someone I can turn to :D
5. You being the one who always skipped NPCC!
6. Polar Bear, for obvious reasons - you're so fair
7. Are you planning to celebrate our 2nd year together, coming Valentines?

EVON-
1. You'll always be my friend, you know too much! :D
2. Let me push you on the airport trolley and scream until we're out of breath, LOL!
3. LIME GREEEN
4. How we're so alike and also the fact that you're my Bestfriend :)
5. Us staying up late during the camp and being my first friend in Sec1 <3
6. Giraffe
7. How do you do it, being ultra nice to everyone you meet? :) :) (thats what makes you special)

2006-08-20T01:03:00.000+08:00

DERRICK-
1. Chicken wings and desserts
2. Get full marks for Math test and prove Woo wrong :)
3. RED, because of your bag
4. Your sincerity :D
5. You being everywhere Eli went on the first few days of school, lol
6. DOG! for many reasons
7. When am I getting my durian puffs? heh

TERENCE-
1. Science nerd
2. Teach our group how to play a song on the guitar
3. Black because I first saw you in a black shirt
4. You being hardworking
5. erh, listening to STOMP during the meeting
6. Turtle
7. Why are you so hardworking? lol

ELI-
1. I like the way you write
2. Tie your hair in a ponytail :)
3. RAINBOW
4. Your passion for Music
5. Your really cool hair
6. Cat because you fed it
7. What will it take to bring the Rainbow to you?

2006-08-19T23:43:00.000+08:00

SUNNY-
1. Small eyes, straight teeth
2. Wear your orange goggles at the T10 table before assembly! or Wear your retainers to school (its for your own good lah)
3. ORANGE :D
4. Your generosity :)
5. Irony: Mixing your name up with Salem's during Whacko. HAHA
6. erh, fruit can? Orange!
7. Can you take my Math promo paper for me please?

EVAN-
1. (in a low voice) "obsessed with LALA, GYM and DOTA"
2. Speak with a high-pitched voice in the mornings
3. Grey, because of your bag
4. Your determination, be it in LALA, GYM or DOTA x)
5. You talking to me about your badminton career, lol
6. Squirrel, a really cute one
7. So how's it going for you and her?

DAVID-
1. Nice name
2. Go for training and train in slippers (haha, kidding)
3. Blue, because of your floorball stick
4. Your floorball stick that looks very expensive
5. Helping the kids at the camp?
6. this is tough, lol
7. So, how much was your floorball stick? :D

2006-08-18T22:42:00.000+08:00

If you tag on my board,

1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll challenge you to try something.
3. I'll pick a colour that I associate with you.
4. I'll tell you something I like about you.
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory about you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something I've always wanted to ask you.
8. You must post this on yours.

---
When there are pests all around you and you don't know what to do

2006-08-17T22:03:00.000+08:00

He stared at them blankly.

"Why are their faces glowing even though they are on their own? Why are their eyes peeled onto the glass panel when there is nothing on the other side? What are they thinking? They must be crazy!"

He noticed a glisten in their eyes, they lit up.

It was the visitation of a grandmother with an innocent baby in a cradle.
It was the homecoming of a father with overjoyed faces.
It was the arrival of a son with a warm smile.
It was the welcoming of a lover with a hug and a bouquet of flowers.

He witnessed a moment where love was in existence, in a place filled with patience from waiting for their landing, hope in seeing them once again, faith that the relationship would remain the same and joy upon saying a simple "Hello!".

Will Fill recalled the time he waited for that girl. She was going away, perhaps for a year or maybe two. All he ever wanted for her was to see her happy. He knew she was delighted about leaving this place, about forgetting what he had done for her, about starting a new chapter without him. After such a long time, he knew that well enough. Hence, Will by his will, pushed himself to send her his best wishes and decided never to patiently wait for the hope and have the faith that he would get the joy from loving her once again.

2006-08-16T18:52:00.000+08:00

Your love makes me strong

Just dropped by one of my close friend's blog and was very encouraged by how God has moved in her whole life. Really amazing. I remember how she, together with a few of our other close friends, had to repeat Sec3. Perhaps if it happened to other people (reads: or myself), they might have lost all hope in studying and lose all purpose in proving themselves but I remember her courage. I remember her not giving up on herself. Most importantly, I remember her faith in God. She encountered a setback but she didn't allow herself to be victimised. Instead, she believed in God's plans for her. I can never think of a moment in her life where she had doubted God. She was faithful in serving Him, be it in church or in school. She was prayerful. She was small but mighty in God. Wait, she still is :)

It's the big Os for her this year and she applied for DSA through Choir. God has blessed her with a beautiful voice, a creative mind that is musically inclined and a really pretty face. By His grace, she has been granted a place in AJC, TJC and SAJC! How not to marvel at God's faithfulness?

---

Well, I still remember what God had spoken to me about last year. He directed me to a school to work towards. He promised that as long as I believed and work for it, I could. He had big plans for me. I believed, however I have never learnt how to lean on His promises, I always lose sight of His hand whenever the going gets tough and I have yet to seek Him first. And I thought I would be given with no effort, nothing.

Run away - something I seem to be best at

Everytime God speaks, I start avoiding. Perhaps its because I lack the faith to move. Perhaps its because I lack the courage to believe. Perhaps its because I'm too afraid of failure. I tried heading out to another land knowing there wasn't peace in me at all. Then I thought I should just leave His presence, this way He can't do anything to me anymore. But I realised, He's everywhere.

Whoever thinks that they can go against His best wishes for us, has thought wrongly. Very wrongly.

Jesus, I believe in You
Teach me how to trust

2006-08-14T23:22:00.000+08:00

I just typed this whole entry regarding something I promised myself to never ever mention again. I know what an irony life can get sometimes, or rather myself. It's just six days away. Perhaps after this month I'ld allow myself a chance but not now, not yet and maybe not ever. Sorry. The many heartbreaks and ludicrous state that people around me are in has proven how little love mean to the society these days.

2006-08-13T13:42:00.000+08:00

If at first an idea is not absurd, then there is no hope for it.
Albert Einstein

IDEA: "DELIA, MARRY ME :D" (Siewling)
Haha! Sheesh, there's hope in't!?! Don't want! YOU CAN GO AHEAD WITH YOU-KNOW-WHO! :) :)

Photos from T10 Outing

2006-08-12T21:22:00.000+08:00

Today I found myself wondering if I'ld ever fall in love with someone who'ld love me back. Will we share common interests? Will we tour the World together? Will we do sports together? Will we eventually share a covenant? Will we support each other in our careers? Will we have our own house? Will we have kids? Will we name our son Jude? Will we retire together? Will we grow old together? Will we watch each other drop the last of our teeth? Will we..

Maybe we have already met but we don't know yet. Maybe we have yet to meet but we will one day. Actually I say we may never meet at all.

2006-08-12T01:53:00.000+08:00

I enjoyed myself very much this week! :D :D
Tuesday - National/College Day celebrations and Sports Day
Where Charis and I helped to cheerlead for Canberra (whom by the way won Best Cheerleading at the end of the day!). We then went for lunch and stuff. Headed down to the airport with Sunny and Salem for some revision before we sleepyheads headed home.

Wednesday - Singapore's 41st Birthday! (:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Went for cellgroup meeting and then Alex drove 7 of us in his car to have lunch at Cartel. Lings and I then made our way to One Fullerton to chill out and eat gelato. Tried catching the fireworks from the NDP but the buildings were blocking ): Anyhow, I still enjoyed my time with you lah! Don't worry about you ditching me all the time, I'm honestly alright with it. TSKKK! Lol. Hope you enjoyed yourself though (still haven't talked to you since then)

Thursday - T10 Outing, WHOOOHOOOOOOO
Had a meeting at school in the morning and lunched with the peeps from the Cambodia trip. Those people are really interesting man. Lol. Met Derrick and Mh then we proceeded to Marina Bay. We played Ultimate Frisbee (which we named Trisbee because it belongs to TT) and soccer (which we named TeeTen, for ovious reasons) where I had the most fun I ever had since OBS :D :D :D Now that we have these two things at hand, we can always try to find time amidst our busy schedules to meet up and play yeah? (: Then we flew our kites. Been long since I last flew a kite and it felt really good! Hehs, we then had a very sumptious meal and a great time playing the mystery number game. This time it's not to finish up the food because we cooked a whole heap of food just for the game. Lol! More photos and videos to be uploaded soon

Friday - a normal school day, not (:
Dragged my feet to school. Nodded off during some lessons. Then 4.30pm came :) Caught up with my Bestfriend over dinner. Went to shop a little and found so many nice stuffs that mentioned our phrase :D :D Then met Sunny to watch the fireworks display and etcetra. Yes! I finally went for the Singapore Fireworks Festival x) Which pretty much rounds up my National Day break and call it - AWESOME!

2006-08-10T01:54:00.000+08:00

When everyday with you was a lesson for me
Shifu, thanks for believing in me

2006-08-07T23:30:00.000+08:00

Expectations does cause greater disappointments. Greatness may not always mean goodness and simple words may just be the perfect way to express ourselves. Let time tell. So this is what they call, the test of friendship?

2006-08-06T18:15:00.000+08:00

Heard from many people that there's an error in my blog. I think I've managed to rectify it already (:

This weekend was so packed. Headed down for a medical checkup after school on Friday in preparation for the Cambodia trip. I love my doctor, he found my vein so easily (tsk, the blood donation nurses!) when he needed blood samples for my blood test. He also made me feel not that scared about injections. Heeeehs! Then rushed down to SIS for Festival of Praise 2006. Awesome! Went home with Margt Tangy and Tanya after that :D :D

Was being a bummer on Saturday. After getting Ryan's gift with the rest, we headed down to Garden Hotel for a great time at his party. Happy 18th Ryan! All of us had a very wild time - laughed so hard even before we ate and after that we had a water war. Sorry Towtruck! Truce? (: Photos here!
Celebrated CHC's 17th Birthday during service today
Your grace brings me to my knees

2006-08-03T22:51:00.000+08:00

Here's the schedule for Singapore Fireworks Festival this year:

06 Aug (Sun) - Concert begins at 8:30 pm and fireworks display begins at 7:45 pm
08 Aug (Tues) - Concert begins at 9 pm and fireworks display begins at Midnight
09 Aug (Wed) - Concert begins at 8:30 pm and fireworks display begins at about 8 pm
14 Aug (Mon) - Concert begins at 9 pm and fireworks display begins at 8 pm

Anyway its so odd because I prefer how they scheduled it on every Sunday of August previously. I remember the best National Day break I ever had in 2004, when you were you and I was myself. Friends forever won't apply for us.

(sheesh, I've been trying to upload some photos of fireworks I took in the past but blogger doesn't want to! ecks :/)

Fireworks teaches me that good things are short-lived

2006-08-02T23:09:00.000+08:00

I promise to be happy

We've finally passed mid-week! I feel a sense of relief all over and it's good. At least the fruitful shopping, laughter-filled dinner and yummy dessert cheered me up much. Thanks DUDE! (as you always call me, haha) Let's hope your jacket is authentic stuff, lol.

I've never been the kind
To ever let my feelings show
And I though that being strong
Meant never losing your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough
But I'm just drunk enough
To let go of my pain
To hell with my pride
Let it fall like rain from my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry

Keith Urban, Tonight I Wanna Cry

How apt? (: But this time will be the last time I'll let myself feel like that because of you. I promise.

2006-08-01T18:44:00.000+08:00

It's hard, so very difficult, this very obstacle I've been trying to overcome. When almost all of my blog entries mentioned you. When my Mozilla Firefox has this URL that leads me to you. When most of the songs on my iPod relates to you. When the very thing that I use everyday is from you. When some things lying around my room belongs to you. When there's someone in school who looks exactly like you. When that person behaves like you. When I find myself thinking like you. When I realise that you've always been on my mind, I tell myself that you aren't and shouldn't. How am I to go about doing this? ):

People say that once your mind is preoccupied with other stuff, you'ld forget being unhappy. Yeah it sort of worked for awhile but now that my mind has surpassed the minimum efficiency scale, the cost is rising and I'm experiencing diseconomies of scale. You've monopolised my cerebrum.

It's the month of August already

2006-07-30T15:45:00.000+08:00

Lovely are Your dwelling places
Thirsty I come after You
Jesus, my Joy and reward
Your love's restoring my soul
Now I'm Yours and You are mine
And from my heart a song will rise

I love You, I love You, I love You
I love You, I love You, I love You
I love You, I love You, I love You
And my heart will follow wholly after You

2006-07-30T14:36:00.000+08:00

Seems like I'm still trying to get you out of my mind
My week has been slow and dreary. Was in the mood of slacking and found myself nodding off even during Econs tutorial (not forgetting Lit lectures too). Sheesh, I don't know what's up with me these days ):

Something that lightened me up a little was that I hung out with Sunny on Thursday. Finally breathed the air outside of Yishun and Sengkang. Lol! Caught The Lake House and ate Carls' Junior and tauhwey. Then we went to play Dead or Alive. AHAHAHAH!! He won lah but I'm sure I'll win him the next time we play again. Watch out!! (x

Had the testimonial match on Friday
Watched Cabaret on a sucky Saturday
Am being an idiot on Sunday, today

2006-07-25T22:50:00.000+08:00

Seems like many people are going through this period of reminiscing, lighten up! Memories are meant to upkeep us and not to drown us (: Sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me the most. I hope today made up for it. Although I didn't say much, I just want you to know that I'll try my best to lend you my ear when needed okay! :D :D

No matter how hard I try to remove you from my life, you'll always remain as a part of me because I've given it away
It's bad enough we get along so well

2006-07-24T12:22:00.000+08:00

Just got up from my 15hr long sleep. Okay, it's nothing compared to the sleep I had after ATC afew years ago but OBS wasn't as tedious as ATC knowing how killer NPCC can get. I forgot to mention in my previous post that we went quarry jumping and we swam in there (because our rafts didn't work out)! Lol, damn cool because the public can never and will never be able to do that ;D I remember the last time I went to the quarry, the water was so blue and nice I wished I would have the chance to swim in there and tadah! my chance came :) Here are some photos from last year

Yeah, I pretty much look the same and so does the quarry. Nice waters uh. Wouldn't it be nice if I can get in there again? Gee, am really missing the camp :/

Anyway back to reality and life on mainland Singapore, today is a holiday for all of us who just got back from camp, for us to recuperate and all. I just spent my whole morning watching teevee and coming online. Next up, I shall laze around till it's time for me to meet my Mum for some shopping and go get my haircut. I'm supposed to meet Seet Siewling but she has ditched me for her darling so, never mind. I have to get used to her neglecting me already since she and ahem are getting into it. LOLLLLL :D Sigh, back to school tomorrow. Countless long days, endless studying for tests and promos, piling up of syllabus, intensive trainings, short nights and wishful counting down till this whole routine takes a standstill before it starts again..

Let's waste time, chasing cars

2006-07-23T16:52:00.000+08:00

Outward Bound Singapore; 19 July - 23 July 2006

Watch: Barker

Charis and I on Day 5 :)

Hello! I'M BACK! lol, I know for sure I've been greatly missed by Zong and immensely desired for by Lings ;) Anyway the camp was just wayyyy coooooool. I enjoyed it very much and have brought home with me many priceless experiences and lessons. Here's a hearty thank you to our instructor: Boon Wee, for being so patient with us throughout and also for being so self-sacrificing. Okay so here's a list of what we did: Belaying, High Elements (where I did the Double-Log-Duo with much help from Jiahe as my partner), Sea Expedition - Boat Rowing (which lasted for close to 3days because we circled the whole island on boat!), Land Expedition - The Legend of The German Girl (where we trekked to the shrine and highest point of Ubin [YES JOANNE :) I DID THINK OF YOU AND ALOY!] and also where I put on Gary's sianjibua look to accompany him on our way back to camp) and some other team games.

And if you think they sound so simple and boring, think again. Behind every wonderful stageplay, there's a lot of hard work behind the scenes. The group had a good mixture of different kinds of people and I really had to learn to adapt to everyone's working habits. Found myself lamenting about how people back in PL would never be like this or like that but it eventually dawned upon me that it's going to be like that out there next time because everyone is not going to come from PL like myself and do things like myself. Also learnt that there isn't only one way to doing things and that really had a great impact on me. I used to think that I'm a very hardy person and seldom have complaints about the circumstances that I'm in but this time round I heard myself whining about itchy bites all around my ankles, tsking away when I have to embrace the nature when Nature calls, ecking away when I can't straighten my legs in the tent because I suddenly appear so tall and throwing tantrums when my surrondings were so stuffy. I never do remember myself doing all these before this. Well, it's either the situations were really that bad or that I've grown too comfortable with life which obviously is the latter.

I've brought home with me not only cuts, bruises, bites and aches but most importantly a new courage that I've found within me and have begin allowing it to be used. And since I cannot discover new oceans unless I have the courage to lose sight of the shore, I'm going to continue allowing myself to drift away from you and meet someone new.

These hard times have made us

2006-07-18T22:57:00.000+08:00

Will be gone for 5 days and be at the Outward Bound School

Pulau Ubin holds a lot of fond memories for me and everytime I go back there, I would see re-enactments of the times we shared together on that island. She met you there under that tree. Okay, the "we" includes a really huge group of people and at different times so there isn't any particular person I'm directing this to. lol

Sometimes I invite trouble for myself

2006-07-17T23:05:00.000+08:00

There's no combination of words
That I can put together on the back of a postcard

No more

2006-07-16T01:05:00.000+08:00

I am doing fine without you..but why do they come back when I'm asleep?

I LOVE YOU TOO (:
Had an amazing time with you guys. Even though we were at a place that smelt like public toilets, with people staring at our silly antics, that lived up to its' name for being budget and temperature dropped till 0d; catching up was still oh-so-good :) Enjoyed myself thoroughly. Let's hit Annabel's place soon? hehs

2006-07-14T23:19:00.000+08:00

I met up with my Bestfriend, Evonowono, today at TM! (: Had dinner and then walked around to get Yvonne's farewell gift. Seems so surreal to have friends starting to head overseas for further studies. It's the beginning of the phrase of coming and going. You've already taken your first step out. Anyway, time to get used to this because slowly but surely, there would be a good many going out there to taste the greener grass. Even Siewling has already did her research on which Uni to hit. In stark contrast, my heart is far far far away from the thought of leaving already. So odd because last year I was all registered, mentally prepared and ready to go. The both of us got a similar pendant and it's really cute. Lol (x I really miss you Bestfriend!! Let's meet up more often, alright? :D :D

New show that I'm hooked onto - Ghost Whisperer. Today's episode was my second and it's either I'm a softie or that show is really a tear jerker. Okay, it's the latter. It is always difficult to deal with the loss of someone we treasure and love a lot but it is inevitable ):

My eyelids are feeling a tonne. Well, I guess a good night's rest is really what I lack. So I better go get some before those weird dreams start haunting me again. Hehs, goodnight World!